三趣看

不吐不快（第1页）

终于，轮到居于末位的王美瑛老师发言。

她老娘早就想趁「新官上任三把火」──代理校长刚上任，还没把事搞砸、尚存威严之时──不吐不快：

「as you know, i’m lily li’s homeroom teacher, as well as ariel liu’s language tutor. i know clearly my responsibilities and obligations. i have already manifested, not just once, i am fully aware of being obligated to do what i have to do, and ready to take any practical measures—and even assist in taking legal actions, provided my presence is necessary. this mittee, nevertheless, kept hindering me from fulfilling my duty. and now, president, your honor, is here. i would like to reiterate my disappointments to all of you—」

「说中文，美瑛老师──体谅我们有些老师不讲英文。」

「get yourselves an interpreter, then—i don’t care—what i have to say i say it out loud and clear. and those who got my point got my point—whichever language i speak in, 老师。only if you choose to listen, not to once again hush me by shouting and hissing──ah-uh, here we go again—now please, let me continue . . .」

「很失礼耶王老师──」「尊重一下好不好？」「权宜问题、权宜问题！」「主席，立刻将王美瑛赶出去！」

见主席的神情比雕塑的表情更加肃穆，叫嚣的人员只好乖乖闭嘴。

「the whole incident just reminds me of j. d. salinger’s famous novel, the catcher in the rye. one particular passage i want to share with all of you—and i assure you: it deserves your attention. now, bear with me—it goes like this:

「‘i keep picturing all the little kids playing some game in this big field of rye. thousands of little kids. nobody's and - nobody big, except me. and i'm standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. what could i have to do, i have to catch every little kid if they start to run toward the cliff—if they're running and they don't look where they're going, i have to e out and catch them. that's all i do all day. i'd just be the catcher in the rye. i know that sounds crazy, but that's the only thing i will have to be.’」

「let me tell you, my peer and respectful senior members, how regretful i am, right now, right here, to have to attend this pointless meeting; not because i have to play the little game with you weaklings, or because i have to sit in this meeting room, discussing some insignificant issues over ‘the school’s prestige’ or the so-called ‘measures to the current pr crises’ and waste my time—oh-oh—

「some people in this room who actually speak english felt seriously wronged and started—you do get my point—this is exactly why i call the members in this mittee weaklings—

「all of you saw the ‘elephant in the room’ but chose to ignore it pletely. if there is a pink elephant, let us point it out with our fingers—if there is a big wolf hiding in the d, lurking to harm our kids—let’s get it, then! why—isn’t it ‘a perfect day for the wolf?’ i don’t see no points that we still sit here and wait for a messiah-like figure to save the day, to remove the threat for us, while we are still far from being late to take action.

「i regretted it, i deeply regretted that i failed to be that ‘catcher in the rye’ when there was a kid, an absolutely lovely sweetheart, who just ran straight toward the ‘crazy cliff,’ while still within arm’s reach—i could have caught her in my arms [a catch in her throat]. i regretted that we just let it happen, as she just fell over the nest, without the slightest chance to grow up and learn to flutter her little but brave wings—」